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Patti’s “Saga of an RV Rookie, or “Am I Gonna Hit the Green Board?”

November 15, 2010 by · 11 Comments 

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November 15, 2010

Patti’s Saga of an RV Rookie: or “Am I Gonna Hit the Green Board?”

 

 “Am I gonna hit the green board?” 

Try as I might, I couldn’t see a green board anywhere, let alone if my husband was going to hit one.  

Joe Boxer chair on the Green Board

"Does this look like a green board to you?"

What green board? I don’t see a green board! “ I  knew I’d hate this backing up thing. Some of my earliest memories were of my Dad yelling out the car window back to mom,  “Irene, you gotta be kidding me! You call that a foot?”  I’ve turned into my mother. The hapless guider waving my hands wildly so it looked like I was doing something behind the trailer.

Ray’s head swiveled out the driver’s window , fleeting visions of “The Exorcist.” “The green board!”  Unspoken aspersions on my intellect hung there like chads in a Florida voting booth. “I don’t wanna hit the green board!”

“I’m serious, Ray. I don’t even see a green board. Where the heck is it?”

He leaps out of the Explorer, index finger air spearing the “green board.” “See…the green board!  I don’t want to back up and hit it!”

“Oh that? You mean that Astro Turf slab?” Never in a million years would it have occurred to me that particular slab was the green board in question. I was looking for something like a lime green  2 x 4 propped against a tree.

My maniacal laughter may have prompted campground neighbors to wonder if an hysterical woman had recently escaped from who-knows-where, or  failed her treatment plan. Sometimes,  I think my husband wonders, too.

Comments

11 Responses to “Patti’s “Saga of an RV Rookie, or “Am I Gonna Hit the Green Board?””
  1. Been there done that, Patti! Love the post. Very funny. Very true! Thanks for the chuckle!

  2. Gene S. says:

    That is hilarious! As the designated driver, I will keep that in mind when seeking assistance in backing/spotting. Describe objects as OTHERS see them–not me.

  3. Patti Faustini says:

    thanks for your comment, Gene. If my blog helped one couple communicate better, it’s all worth it! Patti

  4. Patti Faustini says:

    Melissa, thanks for the feedback! and yes, I’m thinking just about any married RVin’ couple has been there, done that! Patti

  5. Gracie says:

    Patti, Are my husband and I the ONLY ones who goes thru this every BLESSED time that we go camping or when we get home.? PLEASE say NO. I really do not think we will ever get it down pat – you would have thought so after 5 years of camping. Thanks for bringing back a fond memory on this cool no camping day. I got quite a chuckle out of blog. Gracie

  6. Pete says:

    Looks like a green board to me!! My wife and I both claim English as our native tongue, but when it comes to backing the RV we do not speak the same language!

  7. Beverly Mays says:

    Been there, done that! We went to dinner, coming back to the campsite in the dark. I asked if he wanted me to get out while he backed in. “NO.” I pointed out that it was dark, and….CRASH! He backed the motorhome into a tree, cracking the tail light and fiberglass near the light. $4,000 later, he decided that it is better to be safe than sorry. Itoldyaso

  8. Patti Faustini says:

    Hi Pete, Gene, Melissa, Beverly , Gracie, and you other married RVing couples out there…you know I’m talking to you! I love reading your funny back up stories. They unite our humanity. And Beverly, I fervently pray that we NEVER have to do anything with our trailer in the dark! Aghhhhh! A $4,000 lesson is a lesson I don’t ever want to learn! Patti

  9. butterbean carpenter says:

    HOWDY PATTI,
    ‘LANDING TORCHES’, LIKE THEY USE AT AIRPORTS AND ON AIRCRAFT CARRIERS WOULD WORK WELL, ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT… LEFT-RIGHT-COME ON-STOP…THAT’S ALL…
    OF COURSE, THOSE SAME SIGNALS DON’T TRANSLATE FROM VENUSIAN TO MARTIAN AT THE SAME TIME RATE… SO, JUST DON’T GET BETWEEN MH/TRAILER AND FIXED OBJECT !!!!!!!!!!
    YOU MIGHT, ALSO, DO LIKE DENNIS HILL SUGGESTS, PUT OUT ‘BEERCANS’ AS MARKERS !!!!!

  10. Larissa says:

    I can totally relate to this – my hubby and I have been camping with a popup and, most recently, a larger travel trailer. It seems that I am the world’s worst backup instructor. We’ve had rounds and rounds. Once, he even gave up, parked the tow vehicle and went back in the house claiming we weren’t leaving until morning. Well, he did get back out there when I tried to back up with my 12 yr old son helping me…So, I made him by those stupid-looking “hitchin sticks”. They are long yellow poles (fiberglass?), with magnetic bases and red tips. You stick one on the trailer hitch and one on the tow vehicle’s hitch. When they meet up, you are usually lined up just right. Let me tell you, they actually work! I still stand back there with a few directional hints. But, he can do it himself and we have much less stress at that point in the adventure. Yay for hitchin’ sticks! Don’t care how “dorky” they make us seem. I’d rather be a dork, than have a huge fight over backing up.

  11. Patti says:

    Larissa, I may have to invest in those long yellow sticks. Hey, come to think of it, using them could be its own story! thanks for the feedback, and I’m going to try your back up method. It can only get better! Patti

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